Gays in the Republican Party

Gott in Himmel! Zer are gayz in zee Republican pahty
by John in DC - 10/12/2006 08:59:00 PM

Okay, we got caught. It's no use hiding any longer.

We gays are everywhere.

We control everyone.

We control everything (except, of course, international banking, Hollywood and the media - that's the Jews).

It's no use denying it any longer. The Nazis and the Klan were right. We're very very bad people, and we must be stopped before we steal your children and use their blood in our
holiday meals (oh, that's right, Jews again).

The religious right is in full meltdown mode because they've suddenly discovered that there are gay people working openly in the Republican party.

Uh, this is the first time they've noticed? Rick Santorum's press secretary is openly gay. There are scores of openly gay people working in the White House. The Republican National Committee looks like a Gay Disney Tea Dance. And don't even get us started on Senator George Allen's office (think San Francisco, circa 1970, but without the mustaches). To find an openly gay Republican embraced by the highest reaches of the GOP, one need look no farther than the Vice President's campaign director (also known as his daughter).

Yes, Virginia, there are gays in the Republican party, and you've known it for years. So why all the belly-aching now?

I'll tell you why. Because while gay and lesbian Americans have been increasingly welcomed into the fabric of the
American family, including the Republican party, the religious right has increasingly exposed itself as a fringe movement of hateful bigots, and nobody likes them anymore.

While the Republicans are unparalleled in their ability to gay-bait, Latino-bait, black-bait, Muslim-bait, France-bait, and woman-bait, few of them really mean it. Most Republicans don't give a damn about the religious right agenda. In fact, they hate it. I know more than a few Republicans in town, several of them downright conservative, and I can't find a one who has a good word to say about any of the religious right hate groups or their deluded, hate-filled followers. In fact, they find them kind of nutty and obnoxious.

So, it's no surprise the Republican party welcomes the religious right publicly, but then laughs at them behind their backs. And it's no surprise that the Republican party shuns gays publicly, but loves them behind closed doors. They like us. We're fun. They don't like
you. You're not. And it's taken the likes of Falwell and Robertson thirty years to figure it out.

Anyway, you simply must read the latest hate-filled screed from one of the lead far-right groups. This document on its face shows better than I ever could why the Republicans can't stand these people.

(Here's a link to a German-English dictionary, in case you're having trouble understanding anything.)

...the GOP has played a trick on itself. The party brought so-called gay Republicans into positions of power in Congress only to realize that the confidential information they held about a secret gay network was political dynamite that could backfire....

A New York Times story by Mark Leibovich confirmed that gay Republicans have occupied "crucial staff positions" in Congress and "have played decisive roles in passing legislation, running
campaigns and advancing careers."....

If you are getting the idea that gay Republicans may be closeted Democrats, then you are beginning to understand how the Mark Foley scandal could have been a Democratic Party dirty trick.... gay Republicans are in reality "liberal activists" who want to use the party to advance the same homosexual agenda embraced by the Democrats....

Ominously, the Foley scandal suggests that this network has inside information about the sexual behavior of members of Congress and their staffers that can be exploited in order to create scandals at a moment's notice.... It is now apparent that this power has been used to sabotage the party from within....

It is also beyond dispute that the current scandalous state of affairs will outlive the Foley scandal unless the secret network of bludgeon and blackmail is exposed....

It's early in the probe, but we may be looking at emerging evidence of a homosexual recruitment ring that
operated on Capitol Hill. It's time to get beyond partisan politics and follow the evidence wherever it leads. Our media should not be intimidated by charges of "gay bashing." They must lead the way in getting to the bottom of this terrible abuse of power.

Like the guy said. It's early in the probe, but he's gonna get to the bottom of it and make sure everything is exposed. (Is it warm in here?)